You heard Bill Clinton and Drew Carey love Parma Pierogies, but you have yet to ever eat there.
You have gotten 3 speeding tickets, and they are all from the mile long stretch of a suburb named Woodmere.
You go out of town, and everyone asks you if you know Bone.
You can't drive anywhere without traffic due to construction.
You have only been to the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame once, or maybe never at all!
You have no idea how exactly to get to the Flats, you just end up on a bank and start partying.
You know that the East Coast is actually where you find the world's best ice cream, er, custard. And you never left Pearl Road.
You know that all highways lead Downtown, but trying to find exactly where you need to be is another story...just hop on East 9th, you'll eventually get there, right?
You know who the Jake really is.
You hate Baltimore and you have never been there.
"Art Modell can go to hell" is something you can recite over and over again in your sleep.
Everyone is part of the Tribe.
You're still relishing 1987 when we ALMOST made it to the Superbowl.
You don't think Bernie is that bad of a guy. Come on, you know deep down you still love him.
You get attached to a Cleveland athlete of any sport, and he'll leave ya in the end for MO' MONEY...(ring a ding ding)
You are counting down with the monument in Tower City to the exact second in 1999 when the Browns come back.
You know Tower City isn't a city at all.
You wait up till 4am to make sure you have a snow day the next morning, only to find out it's time to start getting ready for school.
The saying 'Mistake on the lake' doesn't exist anymore, unless you live somewhere else.
You can't wait to get back home, you know anyone from here is too attached, and never leaves, once you are here, there is no way out!
You don't really know any homosexuals, you just know that there are a lot of them in Lakewood.
At least half of your wardrobe is Tribe apparel.
You know you don't really have an accent, the rest of the world does.
You hear there are always famous people in town, but you have never seen one.
You hate country music, don't know anyone that does like country music, and yet WGAR just won the country music station of the year.
Your schedule is rearranged for Tribe games.
You find it hard to believe that someone as cool as Tom Hanks made his start here. But you'd brag about it.
You take credit for Cedar Point even though it is 2 hours away.
You know it is the only place in Ohio with life, and that you won't find many cows.
You could walk I480 in your sleep.
You don't watch Drew Carey as religiously as the rest of the country. You just think it's cool he is from here, and that he talks about Parma.
The Tri-C jingle "students for life" scares the hell out of you.
You go away to school, out of Cleveland, and 9 times out of 10 end up back.
You take Dead Man's Curve at 60 mph holding your breath.
You actually know how to pronounce Cuyahoga.
You can't tell Brook Park, Brooklyn, or Old Brooklyn apart.
You love BW-3, but have no clue what the heck weck is.
You find yourself singing "Garfield 123-2323" in the shower.
You're still dumbfounded by the Leaping Fountain in Tower City.
You have never ridden in a taxi.
You wear shorts the first day of the year it isn't below 30 and snowing, just because you can.